His Death & My Tears

Pitifully I weep copious tears
My only solace is the warmth it bears
How curious the cold numbness in my heart
Becomes hot tears as I fall apart!

I mourn his death, but he is not dead
He lives, breathes…in joy, I dread
Far away from me, severing all ties
This void can only be felt when he dies

So I wail, I scream, I sob, I cry
The absence, the loss makes me wanna die
If thus abandoned I’m as good as dead,
Let me live, and feign his death instead!

How else can I ever convince my mind?
That he won’t return, he has left me behind
That he is happy without me in his life
Since I brought nothing to him but strife

Time has flown; it’s been a year
But I’m stuck, still loving him as a dear
The flickering flame of hope that he’ll return
Time chooses cruelly to no longer burn

And so I falsely pronounce him dead
But my grief is real, true tears I shed
Everywhere his memories surround
Remind me that he is no more around

It hurts to even imagine his demise
But alive all he did was despise
His love had faded, mine had not
It’s unfair, it left me distraught

Will my love be eternal, if I put him to rest?
If he lives, I’m afraid that hate will manifest
Only his death can make me forego all fury
Forgive & forget, bitter memories I’ll bury

His death & my tears, a needless tragedy
But my aching heart has only this remedy
Deluding myself so as to survive
His death barely keeps me alive….

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